“Time heals all wounds.”
This means that with patience and the passage of time, any emotional or
physical wound a person has suffered will dissipate totally. In disagreement
with this saying, Rose Kennedy once said “I
do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity,
covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.” The
difference between both sayings is the latter is more elaborate than the
former. However, they converge with regards to the issue of time.
To
my mind, the time required for an emotional or physical wound to heal is not a
fleeting moment. It depends mostly on the nature of the wound, the degree of
the hurt or injury caused by the wound, the individual who has to bear the
wound and if any remedy or solution has been proffered to alleviate the pain
caused by the wound. However, for some wounds there are standard healing duration which can apply generally to all or a wide spectrum of individuals
based on the collective human frailty or nature.
After
a fracture, it takes about six weeks for the bone of the finger or the wrist of
the average healthy adult to heal. For larger bones such as the thigh bone, it
takes a considerably longer period to heal; six weeks to three months. A broken
heart from a failed marriage or relationship can take years to a lifetime to
heal. The heartbreak of having one or more of your children taken from you by
marauding beasts can take more than a lifetime to heal. In fact it can take
generations for the pain to even begin to subside because every time a child is
born to the family afterwards, the pain rises to the surface as the event would
have to be recounted as part of the family history. When such an inhumane, vile
and unprecedented act affects about 219 families (57 girls have so far escaped
from captivity) within the same town, then the history of the town, the state
as well as the entire country will have to bear the mark of this assault on
humanity forever. In any other country in the world an act of villainy such as
this would have its citizens’ faces contorted with grief and completely shocked
out of their wits to no end.
However,
Nigerians being a people like no other have once again set another world record.
This time we have topped the charts as holders of the new and only world record
in the shortest time taken for the citizens of a country to defy the inbuilt
psychological programming of the human mind to completely get over the pain of
a national tragedy of titanic proportions. And all it took was 120 days. Congratulations
everyone! We've done it again! Did I hear someone ask if there is a prize that
comes with achieving such an astounding feat? Yes, there is! However, we may
want to replace the ‘z’ in prize with a ‘c’ as in price. The price that comes
with achieving such a feat is that for each day that culminated into the
current 120 days since those poor girls were in captivity, we the people and
the government all lost a shred of our humanity for 120 days.
It
is believed that our humanity consists of our hearts and souls, but more of our
souls. Considering the fact that the soul is an abstract object incapable of
being seen, touched, measured or quantified, I’ll put it aside and focus on our
hearts. Let’s apply a bit of elementary math to see just how much humanity we
have left in us. If the average human heart weighs between 250 grams (in
females) to 350 grams (in males) and we are to subtract 1 gram for each day of
the 120 days that have passed since the abduction, that will leave the ladies with
a heart weight of 130 grams and the gentlemen with a heart weight of 230 grams.
Ouch! That’s not a lot is it? It seems we’re almost a few notches away from
becoming quite literally heartless.
On
a daily basis we are assaulted by the sickening whimsical horseplay that has
become our reality. A reality where the government considers it far more
important to deploy tens of thousands of soldiers to “maintain law and order”
during elections rather than deploy them to the areas they are needed the most to
protect and rescue the people to whom it owes a major constitutional duty, a
reality where the impeachment of governors is the order of the day and serious
discussions to reunite children with their parents is not even considered
worthy of note. I cannot recall the last time I saw any news updates or
briefings by government spokespersons about plans, if any at all exist to
rescue the girls. Even if you don’t care or don’t have a plan the least you
could do is fake it! Pretend to care!
Sometimes it would seem that it is a crime to
be poor in Nigeria as the travails and troubles of the common man seem to carry
no weight whatsoever on the conscience of the government. I have no doubt in my
mind if the abductees were children of highly placed individuals or those in
government, there would be daily newspaper and television commercial
advertisements with their pictures displayed, asking Nigerians to pray for
their safe return while talks are held to negotiate their release. But as
Chibok is considered a small town tucked away in a far corner of the country
and those affected are not considered worth worrying about, there is no harm in
forgetting about them and moving on.
We
cannot be absolved of wrongdoing as well. We the people also form part of the
government as such we have a duty to act as the government’s conscience.
Therefore, if the government forgets its primary responsibility and moves on,
should we do the same? Perhaps it’s because we are not affected and we bask in
the false security of thinking we are immune to the same event.
A
parent of one of the abducted girls said she would have preferred to have
buried her daughter than go through such anguish. For those who died from the
grief of losing their daughters and the anguish that comes with the buck
passing, ineptitude and nonchalance of a government that failed them, some form
of closure has come their way. For those still living, every day their screams
for a government they placed their trust in to hear their pleas is met with
deaf ears.
Amid
the negativity however, there is some good news. An amazing group of
individuals have for the past 120 days made their presence felt on every
platform available to share the grief of these parents and to remind us all
that despite whatever differences may exist between us, at the end of the day
we all belong to one another and when children are involved, all differences
should and must be set aside. They have been undaunted by the harsh weather
elements and the inconsiderate words of individuals who still bow to the
primitive doctrine of dictatorial hero worshipping. These amazing individuals
are known commonly as the Bring Back Our Girls Group. However, I call
them Nigerians, for they are the true patriots who put aside all sentiments to
stand together and in unison proclaim to the government to do what is right.
The
truth is they can’t do it all alone. It’s going to take all of us because we
are all in this together.
If
after reading this you still find it difficult to relate to why it is important
not to forget these girls or the plight of their parents, please try to put
yourself in their shoes for a minute. Try this, shut your eyes. That dark,
empty void that pervades you when you shut your eyes, that’s what these parents
have been living with every single day. Our children are the light in our
lives. When they’re taken from us in such a horrible fashion and we cannot get
a sense of closure, that’s all we see; a dense dark void. This little exercise
is just an approximation of what it feels like to lose a child. The reality is
much worse.
The fact remains that for as long as those girls remain in captivity, we are all captives to our conscience for our failure to act and force the government's hand into doing what is right. I shudder to think of what answer we'll give our children and grandchildren when they ask us "what did you do when 276 girls were abducted?"
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